Tuesday, January 30, 2007

So emotional

There are a few things, odd as some may be, that are guaranteed to make me cry.

The first one isn't that odd: weddings. Weddings are joyous events, right? People cry out of happiness all the time. Except. I don't exactly cry. I blubber and laugh. And it's not you--I did it at my own wedding. The last wedding I was in, my friend Megan's back in April, I tried so hard to hold my shit together that her grandmother actually stage-whispered in the front row, "What's wrong with that girl? Why is she crying?" Thanks, lady, I think that helped out the situation...

My own wedding, some ten years ago, I remember being so happy that I couldn't stop smiling. And then the smiling led to little laughs, and then the laughing led to out and out crying. And once I started crying, my husband-to-be-in-just-minutes started crying, too.

Prior to my own wedding, I don't recall crying or even getting teary at weddings, though to be honest, I'd not been to all that many weddings before I got married (I had the distinct honor of being among the first of my friends to marry...). The crying-at-weddings has become a little bit of a joke, now, between my husband and I. He kinda just rolls his eyes as I sob my little head off.

Another thing that makes me cry is that damn song that played when Dr. Greene died. I don't know what it is, but any time I hear that song, I get a little weepy-feeling. I don't have an out-and-out bawlfest, but given the right conditions, I totally could.

Standing ovations make me cry. Standing ovations flood me with so much emotion and I don't know why... I've received a few standing o's in my history of performing (once as a soloist and a few times for theatre), but those few personal ovations didn't have that great an effect on me. No--the standing ovations that make me cry are the ones that are given at the end of public performance: the opera, the orchestra, the theatre. The applause washes over me in waves and I tear up, get weak-kneed, and hold my breath lest I start to sob.

Band competitions make me cry. Drump corps competitions make me cry. This particular example is doubly bad because often enough, there's also the chance of a standing ovation happening. GREAT.

I think one of the reasons I cry at band competitions is because way back when I was in marching band, we had the BEST drumline in our division. But, even if our drumline had sucked, I suppose I'd cry over band shows just because being in the band was actually a lot of fun: bus trips, weekend dinners at McDonald's or Burger King (I wouldn't touch either place now for fear of dying, but when I was 16 and 17, those places were awesome), friends, music, performing (and how)... I wasn't disciplined enough to move on to drum corps, but my sister did (she later moved on to instruction), and years after I graduated high school and band, I found that I couldn't watch her performances without bringing some sort of emotional support system with me.

One late spring, I came across the trailer for the sappy flick, The Notebook. I watched that thing no fewer than 10 times in a row, reducing myself to a blubbering mess after only two viewings. I then read the book and declared the whole thing crap. I can watch the trailer and the movie, now, without even a hint of emotion. But, other movies and trailers get me; see Love Actually. TV shows, too: Grey's Anatomy and the scene where Izzy's wearing the prom dress (ridiculous story, but whatever) and going down the elevator and we cut to Denny dying and they're playing that song by Snow Patrol... Oh DEAR, I was a mess. That's not too weird an emotional response, though.

That's about it for things that make me cry... aside from the typical stuff like husbands calling from the ER, funerals, really good news, or really bad news...

1 comment:

Mmmmissy said...

Kirin would be the first to tell you that "that song" was performed by a fat Hawaiian guy named Israeal Kamakawiwo Ole who died from respiratory problems related to morbid obesity. He was 750 pounds at one point (according to Wikipedia).

Damn, I miss that girl. And all my Philly friends. Yo.